Spencer Hastings And The Fantastical Host Club
by xXEmiShaeXx
Summary: Okay. Lets get this straight. I don't like the Host Club. To be honest they scare me. A lot. Which is why when they took a sudden interest in me I tried to run the other way. Wrong reaction. They ran after me. At full speed. What had I gotten myself into?
1. Mistakes

**Spencer Hastings And The Fantastical Host Club **

**Chapter One: **

**Mistakes **

I had one question. Why? Why had my air headed step-sister forgotten her key this morning? Why did Harry have to go on a date today, when he was the only staff who was suppose to be working? Why did that air headed step-sister I had mentioned earlier have to be obsessed with the Ouran Host Club? Why? Okay. Maybe it wasn't just one question. Maybe it was a few. But they were all along the same line so it didn't matter. Why? I think angels up in heaven were messing with me. Do you see me even though you're in heaven father? Do you see who mom decided to marry? Do you? If so, can you strike him dead or something? I know, I know; it isn't nice to ask people to strike someone dead. But this guy? Really? I guess mom was lonely. I just wish she had married that nice guy from her work instead of the idiot she did marry. Yeah, yeah; it isn't nice to call people idiots. Sorry. But Japan? He had to move us to Japan? Right. I haven't introduced myself.

Last name; Hastings, like that one character from Pretty Little Liars. First name; Spencer, like that store in America. Where I no longer live. I guess I should explain myself or something. I'm 15 years old and a freshmen. My father was diagnosed with leukemia when I was three, and battled until I was 13 when he lost. I still talk to him. I like to think that he can hear me even though he's so very faraway. Last year my mom married a guy named Takenaga Horomshikai. Long last name? Yeah that's what I thought. This guy had a daughter prior to his marriage with my mom. Shansho Horomshikai. She was only a year older than me and was a sophomore. Or second year, according to the Japanese. Shansho's mom was half Spaniard or something, so Shansho had long silky black hair, almond shaped dark brown eyes, perfectly tanned skin, and a heart shaped face. I was a wallflower compared to Shansho. My hair was blond, like my dad's, I had my mothers blue eyes, and my fathers snow white skin. I was full fledged American. I was actually really shy and I didn't like talking to people I didn't know. Which was part of the reason I didn't like the Ouran Host Club. They scare me. Really. With the way they flirted with every girl they saw. Shansho loved them. So did most of my group of friends. Emi loved someone named Honey. Keiko loved someone named Mori. The other girls I didn't listen to because they fawned over them too much. Kimeiko was different. She didn't care. She had never been to the Host Club and as far as I knew, she never wanted to. Kimeiko was obsessed with anything from America. So naturally she befriended me. She loved pelting me with questions about America. She also forced people to call her Kim. She thought it sounded more American. I was the only one allowed to call her Kimmie. She had thin black hair and almond shaped golden eyes that almost always looked passive.

At the present moment I was pacing outside of Music room 3#, where the club was held. My hands were sweating and I was starting to hyperventilate. I didn't do well with people in general. The girls in my classroom said that I didn't understand how they felt because I had never been to the Host Club. I never denied it and I never confirmed it. To be honest I had been there before. And like I said it freaked me out. I was already nervous and sweating in un-lady-like places, and I was starting to seriously hate this stupid schools stupid uniform. I know. It sounds petty. But it was a dress. Back in Fresno, California, at my old school we didn't have to wear uniforms. This school's uniform was an ugly yellow frilly little thing that rich girls would probably like. I was not raised a spoiled little rich girl. I was one of the kids who ragged on the rich kids and scoffed at how much they got to spend each day. My step-father was rich. Loaded. He usually tries to win me over with money. Giving me his golden credit card and telling me I can buy whatever I want. Except, I'm one of those people who hate spending money unless absolutely necessary. That was the way I was brought up. Apparently My step-dad noticed this. Which is why he ended up giving me the gold card more than his own daughter. Mostly because he knew that I wouldn't blow it all on, 'that like, juicy, totally in, like, hot pair of Gucci stilettos.' This was not how Shansho saw it. She thought that her dad was picking me over her. Which was why she hated me so much. She tried to avoid me as much as possible, glared at me all the time, and faked older sister stuff only when my mom or her dad were looking. I was fine with it though. We had a mutual agreement. After 20 minutes of gathering my courage, I reached for the handle of the door. It hovered right above it indecisive.

"Is there something that I can do for you Miss?" A voice called from behind me. I jumped at least 7 inches in the air, and spun around, clutching at my heart. My eyes landed on a boy about my height, with short brown hair, big brown eyes, and delicate looking hands. Actually the boy himself looked as delicate as a girl. I squinted at him. He seemed familiar…Then it hit me. He was in my class. And he was apart of the Host Club. Haruhi Fujioka. Crap.

"Um...Actually yes." I smiled at him in relief, though I knew I seemed weird. I extended my hand with the key in it, "You're in the Host Club. Please, give this to Shansho Horomshikai." I smiled pleasantly at him. He gave me a questioning look.

"Why give it to me when it would be so much easier to give it to her yourself?" He asked his eyes probing. My eye twitched and I was about to explain why I couldn't go into the room of death when we were interrupted. By one of the Host Club members. I wanted to scream. Too many new people.

"Oh Haruhi! There you are! Daddy was so worried about you! Where'd you go?!" The too-pretty blond haired boy asked Haruhi as he squeezed the younger boy to death.

"Get off. I was just studying. Some of us need to do that remember?" Haruhi said as he pushed the blond haired boy off.

"Haruhi! We missed you so much!" Two voices cried in unison. The bodies that went with said voices were two twins. They were also in my class. Double crap. They both had spiky gold hair, and half closed yellow eyes. Quick Spencer! While you have a chance! Get out! Get out! Abandon mission! I was about to make my escape when I ran into someone's chest. Lovely.

_Smooth Spencer. Real smooth. _

Shut up.

Have you ever had your inner voice permanently tuned into the U-Suck channel? Yeah. It's not pleasant. Not at all.

"Well well, who do we have here? Are you here for the Club?" The boy I had run into asked loudly. I had the feeling that he wanted everyone to know I was there. He had dark hair and glasses. He reminded me of a cold hearted tax collector. Sorry dad. I didn't mean to judge someone by their appearance.

The blond boy looked at me and smiled. I felt my eye twitch again. Why Kimmie? I wouldn't feel so intimidated had she agreed to come. But when I asked her she just snorted and walked the other way.

"Hello my darling." He took my hand and seemingly made a rose appear out of thin air. He handed it to me. "Now come and behold all of our dazzling club." I swallowed.

I looked to Haruhi for help, "Earlier you asked me why I wouldn't do it? Do you see why now?"

"Oh Tamaki! Where'd you go? We were talking and then you just disappeared!" A horribly familiar voice sing-songed as the door opened. "Oh there you are! I thought we could-" She cut herself off as she saw him holding another girls hand. Then her gaze traveled up and she saw me. Her sugary sweet smile melted off of her face and was replaced by first shock, then anger. Man. Why me? Why'd I always have to get into these kind of situations. I dropped his hand as quick as if it had burned me. "Why are you here?" She asked in a cold voice. I knew that voice. It was the you-ruined-my-life-now-I'm-gonna-try-to-screw-your-life-up-too, voice. Triple crap. Is that even possible?

"I wasn't…I mean…I didn't come here to…But I…" Failed attempts at an explanation. I hung my head. "Here." My fist was clenched so tight around the key that my skin was straining against the bone.

Her cold dark eyes looked at my hand, and then came back to my eyes, "What is it?"

"Um…Your key. You left it on the hook this morning, and when I got home, well Harry told me he was, uh, taking a personal day, and I'm visiting with someone and I wouldn't have been back until 8:00, and you would have been stranded outside the house and I didn't want that and-" She cut me off.

"I've heard enough. Thanks." Her tone was too cold to even suggest that she was sincerely thanking me. She gave me a look that said I was going to pay later. Oh man, oh man, oh man.

_Spencer, you are so totally screwed. _

SHUT UP U-SUCK CHANNEL!

I shuffled my feet. "You can go now." Shansho said as she waved her hand dismissively. I heard a snort sound from behind me. I paused that sounded oddly like…I turned around. And there she was leaning against the wall in the shadows. She wasn't wearing her school uniform anymore. She was wearing a pair of black skinny jeans, a black Anarbor concert T-shirt, and a pair of All-Stars which had words on them I was sure no one could actually read. Her hair was down and completely straight. She was smoking a cigarette. She blew out a few smoke rings. Shansho looked at her and her expression turned dangerous. "Who are you?" She asked. Kimmie coolly stayed calm as she watched Shansho.

"The question is"- she paused to take another drag of her cigarette-"who are you?" She asked while blowing more smoke rings out. My step-sisters eyes narrowed. "Where do you get off treating her like she's your servant? She's your equal."

Shansho glared at her coldly, "The way I treat her does not concern you." She said in a low voice. I saw my best friend smirk.

"Oh, but it does. You see"-here she pushed off the wall and slowly strolled towards us-"Spencer is a good person. She deserves to be treated with respect." Kimmie finally reached us. She stood at my right shoulder and blew out more smoke.

Shansho's eyes narrowed, "How old are you?"

"15."

"You're so not allowed to smoke here"

"Your point is?"

"I could get you expelled."

Kimmie chuckled, "Don't think you'll get anywhere by threatening me."

"You don't care if you're expelled?" Shansho asked.

"Frankly? I couldn't give a damn."

"You have a dirty mouth."

"And you have a dirty personality."

"Do you even know who I am?!" My step-sister growled. Kimmie smirked.

"Of course." She took a long drag again, "You're that one transfer student right? The Hag form Hell?" Shansho sputtered.

"You-You…I can destroy you! Your reputation!" She nearly shouted.

Kimmie scoffed, "You can take your threats and stick 'em where the sun don't shine." Kimmie grinned at her. She was having fun.

"I can get you kicked out!"

"Yes. You do that. Because as a black belt I can just kick your ass."

"You insolent little-"

"Ooh, big words. Extending our vocabulary are we?" My sister's eyes were dangerous.

"Whatever then." She said to Kimmie and then turned her cold gaze on me. "And you. Good-Bye." She then reached in to give me a hug, which I didn't return because I was in shock. She put her lips to my ear and whispered in a low voice, "Just wait till we get home." She then pulled away and started to stalk down the hall. My shoulders slumped. I knew she'd make good on her threat. Kimmie turned towards me.

"You're coming with me for Semester break."

"Best friend say what?"

"You're coming with me. Whether you like it or not."

I furrowed my eyebrows, "But I was going to just stay holed up in my room."

" 'Zackly." My eye twitched.

"Your eye just twitched."

"I know."

"Why?" She asked even though I was fairly sure that she already knew. I stared off in the direction that Shansho had made her grand exit in and sighed.

"Why are you looking so worried?"

"I'm afraid her feelings were hurt."

"Why? If it had been you she wouldn't have thought about it twice."

"I know that…"

"Then why?"

"She's still my sister." I answered in a small voice. "And family is family no matter how horrible they are to you." Kimmie shook her head at me.

"That is always what I've admired about you." Kimmie said as she gazed at me in wonder.

"What?" I asked in confusion. Admirable? Me?

"Your ability to just forgive people no matter how bad they wronged you. You're very good at it…Although by being so forgiving, it also makes you hurt a lot more than you have to." Kimmie shook her head at me. As she was about to take another drag from her cigarette I gave her a disapproving look. She paused. "What?" I looked pointedly at the cigarette. She sighed as she dropped it to the ground and squished it out. "There are you happy now?" She asked as she glanced at the cigarette longingly.

"Very." I gave her a bright smile.

"Yeah. Whatever. Come on lets go before I end up lighting another one and then being guilt tripped into putting it out again." She grabbed my hand and started to pull me away.

"Wait!" A voice called and I paused. "Don't you two want to see the Host Club?" The blond boy-Tamaki?-asked as he pleaded with us with his eyes.

"Oh, uh, well, I… You see…" I trailed off as I tried to think of a good excuse to get out of whatever he was thinking.

"Okay Blondie. Listen up: She doesn't want anything to do with you." Kimmie said bluntly. Tamaki's eyes widened.

I furrowed my eyebrows, "Kimmie…" I gave her a look.

"What? Come on. You know that's what you were thinking." I pressed my lips together.

"You didn't have to be so blunt."

"Whatever. Tamaki right?" She asked. Tamaki nodded. "She won't tell you to shove off because that's the kind of person she is. But I'm not. So go back to your little Host club, with all of your annoying, insane, Fan Girls." Kimmie paused to shudder in horror, "And leave us alone." She started to leave again dragging me with her. I furrowed my eyebrows. I looked over my shoulder.

"Thank you Haruhi!" I called. Haruhi's eyes looked surprise. He nodded.

"No problem!" He called back. I turned to Tamaki.

"Sorry for Kim's behavior Tamaki! If it makes you feel any better she treats everyone like that when she first meets them!" Kimmie tugged me harder and we were about to round the corner when someone called out to me.

"Don't think you got out of seeing the rest of the Host Club! We'll get you next time!" Twin voices chorused. My eye twitched again. What? Well we only had one more day left until semester break so if I just laid low then I'd be fine. Right? I wasn't so sure. They seemed diabolical.

_Like I said Spencer; you are so totally screwed. _

And like _I _said; SHUT UP U-SUCK CHANNEL!!!!

My internal arguments were giving me a migraine. And the night had just started. I still had to deal with Shansho when I got home.

Oh joy.

--

**A/n: Heyy!! It's EmiShae and yes…I'm writing a new fanfic. This is my ninth one. I'm sure this is going to bite me in the butt in a couple of weeks, but whatever, I'm writing it now anyway. So I hope you enjoyed it. Oh, and…PRESS THE GREEN BUTTON! YOU KNOW YOU WANT TO! For reals. R&R people! Please? Constructive criticism? Even if you just say that it sucks, tell me how I can fix it. I'm taking what I can get. That's all I wanted to say. Laters. **

**~ XOXO EmiShae**


	2. My Reflection

***disclaimer: Don't own Ouran. T.T. You're so mean for making me say it out loud... **

**Super-Special-I'm-So-So-Sorry-Authors-Note: Please. -grovels at readers feet- SO SO SO SORRY! I didn't mean to get so distracted! SPARE ME! I was going to post this two months ago...But I...I don't know. I have no excuse...Am I forgiven? -dodges readers rotten fruit- I'll take that as a maybe. READ! Maybe it'll make you hate me less!**

* * *

_Review from last chapter: _

"_Don't think you got out of seeing the rest of the Host Club! We'll get you next time!" Twin voices chorused. My eye twitched again. What? Well we only had one more day left until semester break so if I just laid low then I'd be fine. Right? I wasn't so sure. They seemed diabolical. _

Like I said Spencer; you are so totally screwed.

_And like _I_ said; SHUT UP U-SUCK CHANNEL! _

_My internal arguments were giving me a migraine. And the night had just started. I still had to deal with Shansho when I got home. _

_Oh joy. _

_

* * *

_**Chapter Two: **

**My Reflection  
**

Turns out that I didn't have to go home that night. Kimmie invited me to stay the night at her house. So I accepted.

When I had walked into class the next morning I had been nervous. Mostly because of those, two twins. However, they ignored me all day. I was so relieved I was skipping down the halls.

At the present moment I was walking down the hallways with my iPod ear buds in my ears, while reading _Pride and Prejudice…And Zombies. _One of my favorites. The song on my iPod changed and I stopped reading to listen to the intro music. I almost squealed. One of my favorite songs. I looked over my shoulders. No one was around. I started to sing and dance down the hall.

"_Look at me… I will never pass for a perfect bride…Or a perfect daughter  
Can it be… I'm not meant to play this part?" _I spun around in a circle oblivious to mysurroundings.

"_Now I see… That if I were truly to be myself…I would break my family's heart." _ I sort of winced at this part because, well, that's actually what would happen if I tried to be myself around my mother…

"_Who is that girl I see? Staring straight back at me? Why is my reflection someone I don't know?" _ That was exactly how I felt when I looked at myself in the mirror when I was in the Ouran uniform.

"_Somehow I cannot hide…Who I am…Though I've tried." _It was true. I had tried. I had tried so very hard to fit in at this school. But…_  
_

"_When will my reflection show…Who I am inside?" _But every time I tried I always seemed to…_  
_

"_When will my reflection show who I am inside?" _ Fail. Every single time.

I felt like I was going to cry. But I forced myself to hold the tears in. I was so absorbed in my thoughts and my music that I didn't hear anyone walk up to me…A hand came down on each of my shoulder's. I'm a very skittish person. It's not very smart to sneak up on me. I jumped at least 10 inches in the air and stumbled forward, while spinning around. What I saw made me want to run away. The twins…Man. I pulled the ear buds out of my ears and pressed my right hand to my heart.

"You really shouldn't sneak up on people like that! It's not polite!" I gasped, my pulse was still racing. The twins smirked down at me.

"You're jumpy. You scare easily huh?" They asked in perfect unison. My eye twitched. Yes I scare easily…And yes your twin-ness was freaking me out. I nodded slowly. Both started grinning.

"Interesting…" In unison again. I wonder if they do that a lot.

"Um…" I fidgeted nervously. "I have to…" I spun around and…Ran into someone's chest. Again.

_Wow Spencer…Twice in two days. _

Didn't I already tell you to leave me alone?

"Sorry…" I mumbled. I felt heat rise to my cheeks in embarrassment. I looked up and sighed. It was Tax Collector Guy. Why me?

"Of course…Spencer Hastings class 2-A, age 15. Favorite color: purple, favorite music: American alternative. Mother: Cynthia Hastings, turned Cynthia Horomshikai. Father: Takenaga Horomsikai. Sister: Shansho Horomshikai. Best friend: Kimeiko Hara. Boyfriend: Cooper Saunders. Second in her class, behind Haruhi. From America, New York City specifically. And is heir to her fathers electronic empire. Learned Japanese in just a few short weeks. She's still working the kinks out of it. She also knows French and Spanish. She hates dresses. But loves ballet, and is very good at it. Also she is a very good singer, and according to my sources, even though she's only 15, Julliard has already offered her a scholarship." T.C.G. (Tax Collector Guy) announced in one breath as he snapped a little black book shut. I felt my eyes widen.

So now…He was a stalker? How did he…? How did he find out about Julliard? That was supposed to be confidential! And Cooper Saunders…I winced as I shook that painful memory off.A-And I am not. I'm not the heir to anyone's electronic empire. How did he figure that? It's Shansho that's going to inherit that. I was just the step-daughter. What I was planning to do was go to school get good grades and go to college. And I know; I'm not wealthy enough to just pay for college. I figured that I'd get a job, get a scholarship, get some grants, and take out loans. I wasn't going to let Takenaga pay for all of my education. He was already doing so much for me by sending me to Ouran…

"How…But you…And…" I spluttered. He smiled coolly down at me.

"You took me by surprise yesterday Miss Hastings. I didn't know a lot about you. That doesn't happen often." I just stared at him as my cheeks started to feel warm again.

"Well…I…Some of your information was...Uh…Wrong…" I muttered looking at the floor.

"Oh? What was inaccurate?" I heard him ask.

"Well-" I was saved from explaining my situation by Kimmie. Once again, she stepped out of the shadows. This time without a cigarette.

"She doesn't have to tell you. It seems that you already know enough about her." Kimmie said her eyes holding suspicion as she stood next to me.

"Oh, uh, hi Kimmie, funny I was just going to look for you…" I trailed off at her expression.

"Why are you by the Host Club?" She asked raising her eyebrow.

"Well…I wasn't really paying attention to where I was going…." I trailed off.

"Yeah she was singing." Twin voices chorused.

I nodded, "Right. I was si-" I turned to the twins. "You two heard me singing?" I asked and my face probably drained of color when they nodded, mischievous smirks appearing on their faces. I reached for Kimmie's hand. They were starting to scare me.

She sighed in exasperation, "See what happens when you go all Space Cadet and you don't watch where you're going?" She scolded me gently. I frowned.

"Sorry." I muttered.

"Don't apologize…Just don't do it again. What if you do that and I'm not around?" She shook her head at me as she started to pull me away.

"Wait a second." T.C.G. called and Kimmie gave pause. "Kimeiko Hara, also in class 2-A, age 16. Hates her full name and insists that you call her Kim. Favorite color: green. Favorite music: Anything from America, unless it's country. Mother: Kana Mori, turned Kana Hara. Father: Ranmaru Hara. Only child. Best friend: Spencer Hastings. Third in her class behind Spencer. She is heir to her father's fast-food chains, and her mother's talent agency. She can speak English flawlessly and without an accent, and prefers commoners over people in her own social class. Oh yes…And she enjoys tap dancing in her free time." T.C.G. once again announced all of this in one breath. He was smiling down at Kimmie and me. A shiver ran down my back. His smile was kind but his eyes were calculating.

"Great. So now I know you're a stalker." Kimmie said dryly as she attempted to pull me along again.

"As you are probably aware I am Kyoya Ootori." He paused to give Kimmie a meaningful look. She glared at him but didn't try to pull me away again. "I have the private police." He smirked at us. I started to sweat. So what did he mean by that? Was he threatening us?

"Yeah. And I'm a Hara. Last names. Interesting. What do you want?" Kimmie asked a scowl on her face. T.C.G. seemed a bit thrown but quickly recovered. He pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose which made the glasses catch the light, which made the glint hide his eyes. I stepped closer to Kimmie. I think T.C.G. scared me more than the twins.

"I'd like you to visit the Host Club." He replied. I blinked once.

Kimmie snorted, "There is no way-" I cut her off by squeezing her arm. She glanced down at me. I balanced on my tip-toes as I whispered in her ear.

"It's okay. We can go in, and then go out." I murmured. She frowned at me, but I nodded my head towards T.C.G. (Maybe I should call him Kyoya, since I knew his name and all now…) As much as the Host Club scared me, I didn't want Kimmie getting into trouble with them because of me.

"Fine…We'll go in." Kimmie said grudgingly as I grasped her hand tighter.

"This is great. The boss has been agonizing over your rejection all day." The twins snickered in unison. I swallowed. I felt a pang of guilt at being the source of his agony but held onto Kimmie tighter and walked into the room. Suddenly…I was attacked by rose petals. Some landed in my hair.

"Welcome." Four boys said in unison. One I recognized as Haruhi Fujioka, another as Tamaki Suoh. There were two other boys…Who I didn't recognize at all…But I assumed one of them was Honey, and the other Mori. Emi and Keiko love those two…

"Uh…I mean…That is…" I spluttered.

WHAT DO I SAY? WHAT DO I SAY?

_How about, 'Hi'? Smart one. _

Gah. Didn't I already tell you to LEAVE ME ALONE?

_Yeah…Twice actually… _

THEN WHY WON'T YOU?

_Because it's much more fun to criticize you… _

B-But you….Stupid U-Suck channel…Why can't I change it to the, 'UR-Great channel'…Or something like that…

_Because nothing like that exists, stupid. _

How was I suppose to know that something like that doesn't ex-Wait a second! Don't call me stupid!

_I really admire the way you caught onto my insult so quickly…Stupid. _

DON'T CALL ME STU-

"Spencer…SPENCER?" Kimmie started to wave a hand in front of my face. "You were starting to go all Space-Cadet on me again…"

"Eh?" I asked as I blinked several times.

_Is that the best you can come up with? _

WHY YOU-

"SPENCER!" Kimmie exclaimed.

"EH? WHAT? WHAT HAPPENED?" I shouted.

Kimmie had an exasperated look on her face, "You were doing it again…You really need to stop spacing out in the middle of conversations…" She sighed.

_I agree with her. You're an airhead. _

HEY! SHE NEVER SAID I WAS AN AIRHEAD! Besides…It's your fault that I keep spacing out…

_Hey smartie…It's your fault. You're the one talking to me… _

I decided to do something dangerous…Like ignore the U-Suck channel.

I tuned back into the conversation.

"-and as you can see, my princesses, this is my lovely Host Club. It's fantastic isn't it? But of course, you both came here for another reason…To visit us!" Tamaki exclaimed in excitement. He grabbed my hand and…Kissed it. Why did he just kiss…My…Hand…? I was so confused… "Are you going to request me? Please tell me that you are! Oh, you would make my day, my Princess!" He exclaimed hopefulness in his gaze.

"Uh…I…I mean…" I swallowed hard. What was I suppose to tell him? I didn't want to hurt his feelings or anything…

Suddenly Tamaki was no longer holding my hand. Instead there were two pairs of arms wrapped around my waist.

"She didn't come here to request you Boss…Though I'm sure she'd love to spend more time with us." Twin voices purred into both of my ears. I stiffened. How…Did they…? Wha…?

"Uh…I…I mean…That is…" I felt heat flood to my face and I knew I was blushing. I gulped.

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TWO PERVS DOING?" I heard Kimmie shout in outrage.

And before I knew it I was being dragged towards the door. "Wait! You two haven't seen the rest of my glorious Host Club!" I heard Tamaki exclaim.

Kimmie paused to say, "Oh no. No way buddy. Me and Spencer did not sign up for this!" She said with a glare. Then she turned to Kyoya, "You didn't mention harassment when you asked us here." She spat at him as she continued towards the door. Once again we were stopped.

"What are you doing?" The twins chorused.

"What does it look like we're doing? We're leaving. You were obviously making Spencer uncomfortable!" Kimmie exclaimed.

"Yeah? And how do you know that?" One of the twins asked. I couldn't tell which one. When Kimmie didn't respond he continued, "Why don't we ask her herself?" Then he turned towards me, "Spencer were we making you uncomfortable?" He asked. I opened my mouth and then closed it.

WHAT DO I SAY IN THIS SITUATION?

"Uhm…I…Well, I mean…I didn't…Well…" I spluttered. I started to hyperventilate.

From beside me, Kimmie growled, "Now look! You made her all flustered!" She said angrily as she began to pull me, once again, towards the door.

"Wait a second! That's not-" One of the twins started.

"Letting her choose!" The other one finished. Then they both grabbed a hold of me and started to tug me back towards them.

"Wha..! What are you two doing? Release Spencer!" Kimmie shouted.

"Make us!" They shot back.

"Now, now, Hikaru and Kaoru, if they want to go, then they should be able to go. After all, if the princesses do not wish to stay of their own free will, then we shouldn't force them." Tamaki said with sadness in his voice.

"But, Boss!" They protested in unison.

"It's amusing to watch her-" One twin began.

"-get all flustered and red so-" The other added.

"Can we keep her?" They chimed together. Keep her…? Wha…?

"KEEP HER? WHAT IS SHE SOME KIND OF TOY TO YOU?" Kimmie shouted.

"Yes."

"…"

"That's it! Let's go!" Kimmie ordered.

"No! You can't make us give you our new toy back-" The twin with his hair parted on the right started.

"-when we haven't even had her long enough to have _any _fun!" The twin with his hair parted on the left finished. Eh…? I really needed to learn their names and which one was which. Soon.

Then Kimmie was pulling at my right arm, while the twins were tugging at my left arm. I felt like they were playing Tug 'O War…With me as the rope. My arms started to burn.

_Man if they keep this up, you'll be pulled apart, limb by limb… _

Not helping.

_Wasn't trying to. _

Of course not. Why would you ever do anything like that…?

_Precisely. _

You're the reason why I get so many migraines.

_Wonderful! I'm doing my job! _

I decided to ignore the U-Suck channel again.

"Um…Could you…Uh…" I mumbled. But no one paid me any attention.

"Let. Her. Go!" Kimmie growled her eyes black and deadly.

"No!" The twins shouted back.

"You should be the one letting go!" The twin with his hair parted on the right added.

"She's MY best friend! So, LET HER GO!" Kimmie screeched. My arms started to burn so much that tears pricked at the back of my eyes.

Suddenly identical mischievous smirks appeared on the twins' faces, "Fine." They chorused. "We'll let go." And they did just that. They let go so abruptly and without warning that the force of their tugging (or lack thereof) flung me to the side. Because Kimmie had still been pulling with all of her strength.

For a moment I was weightless and I felt light…Until I flew into a couch, which nudged a table, which pitched forward and promptly fell to its side…Bringing a complete set of a China tea set crashing to the floor. There was the sound of shattering glass and then silence. For a moment no one spoke. I was frozen, sprawled out on the couch.

"That was the tea set we just received from Tohru-senpai…" I heard Haruhi's voice say softly.

The U-Suck channel started to laugh at me.

_What did I say Spence? Tell me; since this glorious turn of events happened, what are your plans? Will you flee the country? _

I might.

Either that or die.

Hmmn...Death by Host Club...Interesting...

**A/n: Hey guys! So SO SO SO SORRY! Hope this makes up for it! I have the next chapter in progress! R&R! **

**AGH! So sorry that this was posted in italics at first! I don't know what happened to my computer! Thank Patcheresu for telling me about it! **

**Sorry again…But the italics might stay…I've reposted this several times and I don't know how I can fix this…It looks normal, then I post it, and then it's randomly in italics again! Frustrating! **

**~ XOXO EmiShae**


	3. Mr Glinty Glasses

_LANGUAGE GUIDE: _

**English **

French 

Regular, "Japanese."

**

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*****disclaimer: You know, I'm getting sick and tired of you people asking me the same question each and every time...NO I DO NOT OWN OURAN HIGH SCHOOL HOST CLUB! HOW MANY TIMES MUST I SAY IT? **

**A/n: Hey...I updated sooner than last time...Does this mean you can finally hate me less...? -dodges flying knife- YOU PEOPLE ARE GETTING MORE VIOLENT! JUST READ ALREADY! **

**

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**_Review From Last Chapter: _

_For a moment I was weightless and I felt light…Until I flew into a couch, which nudged a table, which pitched forward and promptly fell to its side…Bringing a complete set of a China tea set crashing to the floor. There was the sound of shattering glass and then silence. For a moment no one spoke. I was frozen, sprawled out on the couch._

_"That was the tea set we just received from Tohru-senpai…" I heard Haruhi's voice say softly._

_The U-Suck channel started to laugh at me._

What did I say Spence? Tell me; since this glorious turn of events happened, what are your plans? Will you flee the country?

_I might._

_Either that or die._

_Hmmn...Death by Host Club...Interesting..._

_

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_**Chapter Three:**

**Mr. Glinty Glasses**

After a few more moments, my own shock wore off a little and I jumped up.

"I-I'm so sorry! I-I just! I…" I spluttered nonsense to the Host Club, who were all in a cluster/group thing by then, "I didn't mean to destroy your tea set! I didn't know that that…That…And I mean…Uh…I'M SO SORRY!" I cried as I bowed multiple times in apology. Maybe there was something I could do…? Of course! "Um…I'll pay for it! I broke it…But…Uh…How much was it?" I asked in a slightly exhausted voice.

The whole Host Club stared at me. Perhaps they were surprised. I don't know…

"Nothing that your family can't afford." Kyoya said as he adjusted his glasses. He checked his black book, looked back up and said, "Roughly 600,000 yen." He said pleasantly. I stared at him in confusion. That was a lot of zeros…But it meant nothing to me…

"6,214$, Spencer." Kimmie clarified. I was silent for a moment.

"S-six…Thousand…Two hundred…fourteen….Wha..?" I started to mumble to myself. Holy. Crap. I was dead. Completely and utterly dead. I mean…I didn't spend that much money on myself in an entire year! How could I just ask Takenaga for that kind of money? It wasn't right! I couldn't! What was I suppose to do…? "Is there, possibly, some other way I could pay it back…Like in a payment plan…or…something…?" I asked quietly.

"What are you talking about?" Kimmie asked incredulously. "Just explain what happened to Takenaga, and get him to give you the money." Kimmie said while brushing my 'problem' away with her right hand.

I frowned at her, "But Kimmie I…I Can't!" I blurted out as I started to wring my hands together in nervousness.

Kimmie raised an eyebrow, "What do you mean you can't? Doesn't he give you money or something? Aren't you the one that he gives that card to?" She asked. Slowly, I nodded, "Then it'll be fine. Charge it on that. He won't even notice that it's gone." Kimmie shrugged. How could anyone not notice that much money gone?

"Oh, but I couldn't do that!" I paused and waved my arms frantically in a 'no way' gesture, "He trusts me! And…and I…I can't use anymore of his money! I couldn't let him pay for something that I broke, it just doesn't seem right. I mean…He does so much for me already. He's…He's sending me here! It must cost an awful amount of money, this school being so prestigious and all! I couldn't possibly do that! It would just be asking for more! And…I can't do that…" I trailed off as I gulped air. "I-I don't want to be a burden…" I said softly. Kimmie's eyes softened.

"I understand." She said softly. She turned to Kyoya, "I'll pay for it. Just send a bill to my house." She told him. Kyoya started to write something down before I interrupted.

"WHAT? No, no no! No Kimmie! I couldn't possibly let you do that! You can't pay this for me! It was my fault!" I exclaimed while shaking my head and waving my hands around. She frowned at me.

"Well, then how are you supposed to pay for it?" Kimmie asked in confusion. I paused and gave a nervous smile. "You didn't think of that, did you?" Her tone was flat.

"Gah! I'm sorry!" I apologized and bowed again. I heard Kimmie sigh.

"Don't apologize. Just…Try to think things through. I mean, if you're not going to let anyone help you, then you should have a back up plan." She gave me a stern look. I frowned and continued fidgeting. What was I suppose to do…?

"If you don't mind my suggesting, you could pay it off by working for us." Kyoya said, his glasses still holding a glint. I blinked at him…And then smiled in relief.

"Oh, yes! That would be perfect! I could cook…Or clean…Or run errands…I'm happy to do whatever you offer to pay back my debt!" I said happily as I clapped my hands together. Kimmie, however, narrowed her eyes at Kyoya.

"What did you have in mind for her?" She asked suspiciously.

Kyoya smiled at her, "Nothing too tiring. I just want her to perform for our guests. Spencer would be singing and dancing for them. That's all. No hard labor I assure you." Kyoya said coolly. I froze.

"Y-You want me…To…Perform…?" I asked in shock. Kyoya nodded, "But…I can't! I'm not a good dancer…And my singing really isn't that good! I'm afraid that I would be more of a hindrance than anything!" I exclaimed in worry.

Kimmie snorted and turned to Kyoya, "She can sing _and _she's an exceptional dancer. She's the only one who doesn't think so." Kimmie said with a slight glare in my direction, "How long would it take to pay off her debt?" She asked gravely.

"Probably a year or so." Kyoya said with another brief, fake, smile. Kimmie frowned.

"That's a long time…" She sighed.

Kyoya's glasses glinted again, hiding his eyes, "If you want to help Miss Hastings you could work here too. I heard that you're an exceptional tap dancer, and you can play the piano quite well." He complimented her.

"N-no Kimmie…I couldn't…Let-" She cut me off.

She shot me a slight glare as she turned towards me, "Sometimes, Spencer, you need to let people help you out." Then she turned back to Kyoya, "You have a deal Mr. Glinty Glasses." Kimmie said as she stuck her hand out. Kyoya, who was also familiar with American customs, shook her hand with a charming fake smile in place on his lips.

"But…I'll just harm the Host Club! I'm a terrible singer and dancer!" I exclaimed. Everyone turned towards me, surprised at my outburst.

"What are you talking-" One twin started.

"-about toy?" The other one finished.

"We heard you sing. You're good." They chimed in unison. Red flooded my face.

Kimmie nodded in approval.

"I haven't heard her sing!" Tamaki said a little bit shocked. He turned to me, "We must hear Spencer sing!" He declared. Wha…?

"Yeah. Just have her dance while she's singing." Kimmie added as she ushered me to the middle of the floor.

"I don't have music!" I protested.

"Just play it on your i-pod." Kimmie ordered and then smiled at me. I swallowed.

"I-I don't have my Pointe shoes…" I murmured.

"Then don't dance Pointe. Just do regular ballet." Kimmie gave me another I've-got-you-trapped smile. I blinked at her. What happened to her wanting to leave?

_You blew that out of the water when you broke the tea set…_

Please I beg of you…LEAVE ME ALONE!

"Uh…I'm in my uniform…I don't have anything else…" I said desperately.

"That's fine; it's like wearing a tutu anyway." Kimmie said matter-of-factly. Dang.

"It's…It's impossible to dance ballet and sing at the same time!" I protested. Which it was. Have you ever seen the Nutcracker? You barely have enough time to breathe, let alone sing.

"Just use the basics then; just the positions that aren't too tiring, and cut back on the leaps." Kimmie countered.

"B-But I-I d-don't…" I trailed off trying to think of a valid excuse.

"Face it Spence; you have to do this." Kimmie said with a smirk at my defeated expression. I sighed and put my i-pod on a side table. All of the Host Club and Kimmie were sitting either on a couch or on the floor facing me. I frowned, turned my back on them, and scraped my long blond hair into a high bun. I scrolled down my songs and chose one. I took a deep breath and pressed, 'play.' The song was Alice Human Sacrifice.

The beginning music came on (it sounded more like demented carnival music) and, on the balls of my feet; I started to sway in time with the music.

_"The first Alice was a wrathful woman of the Spade,_

_And righteously she held a sharpened blade within her hand._

_Never hesitating to slay all within her way-"_

I paused here to spin and jab my hand out as if I were holding a sword.

_"Creating paths of blood that followed her through Wonderland._

_Deep into the darkened forest, Alice walked the line-"_

I tiptoed in a straight line.

_"Captured and imprisoned as an embodiment of sin._

_If it were not for the murderous wake left behind…_

_No one would have suspected that she had ever been."_

I dropped to the ground and hung my head, then leaped up and spun around quickly. For the next line, I dropped my voice lower in a guy's octave.

_"The second Alice was a fragile man of the Diamond._

_The broken echo of the lies within demented words._

_He sang his twisted melodies to all in Wonderland-"_

I stood up, did an elevé, and then spread my arms wide.

_"Creating the image of the sick and the disturbed._

_Deadly, yet so beautiful, his voice just like a rose,_

_Was shot by a madman, who silenced him through death-"_

I started to melt down in a Plié.

_"Single rose bloomed in his place, with no music composed,_

_With twisted grin this dying man lay breathing his last breath."_

I lowered myself gently to the floor, then leaped up, and started to rock back and forth, as a child would, and played with my lace, as I started to sing the next lines in an extremely girlish young voice.

_"The third Alice was an innocent young girl of Club._

_An enchanting, graceful figure in the world of Wonderland._

_She charmed the people in the land to every beck and call-"_

I started to skip around. I did a couple of fast spins.

_"A peculiar country answering to each command._

_So she rose into the throne to be the country's queen…_

_Consumed by paranoia of her own impending death-"_

Here I started in a Plié, then slowly worked my way into a pirouette, spinning a couple of times.

_"Soon the queen succumbed to a dark and nightmarish dream-"_

I fell to my knees.

_"Disguised in kindness, loathing fate, she secured her regime."_

In the next part, I made my voice a little older but still girlish.

_"And as this passed two children walked in the woods-"_

I lowered my voice a bit for the next part.

_"Partaking in tea underneath the trees, they'd never part-"_

Here I used the strength in my calves to leap up and execute a small échappé sauté through the air, and sang in the girlish voice again.

_"They found an invitation to the queen-"_

I landed in a Plié. I switched my voice to a lower octave with my head facing downwards.

_"It was the Ace of hearts!"_

I did another elevé and spun myself around.

_"The fourth Alice was a pair of golden twins._

_Entering Wonderland with pride under their grins-"_

I melted into the splits and sat there for a few moments.

_"Passing through countless doors, their hands together tied._

_In each other's hearts was were the other's deep love lied-"_

I did another échappé sauté and switched my voice to a girlish one.

_"A stubborn elder sister-"_

Then I switched my voice to a lower one as I sang the brothers part.

_"A witty younger brother-"_

I slipped back into the girls' octave for the last few lines.

_"But they had strayed too far into, Alice's Wonderland so..."_

The music stopped here, and all you heard was a creaking sound and a muffled bird cawing in the background. I took up first position with my head bowed.

_"One will never wake from the sleep they didn't plan._

_Though one's dead, they both will never escape Wonderland!"_

I dropped to the floor in, what I assumed looked like, a very low curtsy. The carnival music trailed off. I straightened my back out, sashayed to my i-pod and paused it.

I was panting, my heart was beating hard, my pulse like a hummingbirds', and my face would undoubtedly be an unattractive scarlet. I pushed the hair that had come out of the makeshift bun out of my face. Then, knowing that I couldn't avoid it anymore, I looked up. What I saw surprised me.

Everyone in the room, except Kimmie, Kyoya and a tall boy with dark hair, had their mouths hanging open.

"Y-You…" Tamaki stuttered and pointed to me with his finger shaking.

I frowned, "I know that I'm not good…" I murmured softly. "I told you that you shouldn't have me sing." I sighed as I shook my head at Tamaki. I sat down on the floor and started to stretch myself out.

"WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? OH, I CAN SEE IT NOW! I HAVE ANOTHER DAUGHTER! THIS ONE GRACEFUL AND EVERYTHING A LADY SHOULD BE!" I heard Tamaki say, right before he scooped me up from the floor and started to twirl me. Wha...? He...Has...A...Daughter...? "You're amazing! A voice like an angel!" He exclaimed. He...Just…What?

"Sempai."

"Yes Haruhi?" Tamaki asked excitement still in his voice.

"You're acting like an idiot again. Plus you're scaring her." Haruhi deadpanned. Tamaki immediately dropped me (abruptly, I might add) and ran to a corner in the huge room. I sat there in shock.

I stared at him in worry. "Uh…Tamaki-Sempai…? Are you alright…?" I asked while frowning.

"He's fine; he does this all the time." Haruhi sighed as if Tamaki's actions made him tired.

I started to fan myself with my right hand. It was really hot in the yellow marshmallow dress…

"Exceptional. I'm sure our guests would love to have entertainment." Kyoya said with a satisfied smirk on his face.

I started to fidget. "Of course they'll love her! She's so cuutee!" Tamaki said as he, magically, recovered from whatever hurt he had felt. He took my right hand in his.

"A voice like an angel and her dancing! So graceful!" He exclaimed with a smile. I uttered a nervous laugh as I continued to twitch.

"However," Tamaki's smile dimmed, "I'm worried about the song that you sang. A young girl shouldn't sing things like that! She should sing things of flowers and cupcakes and girly things!" He exclaimed as he started to do complicated dramatic poses. "The song you sang was much too dark! They didn't get a happy ending!" He cried as if it were a tragedy. My lip twitched of its own accord.

"Especially the twins." The twins chimed while looking at me curiously.

"Uh…That's just how the story is told I suppose…Though there are different endings…Sometimes it goes, _'But both will never wake up from the dream that they had not planned; forever they will wander hopelessly in Wonderland.'_" I paused to catch my breath and then continued, "Or, _'Bound inside an endless dream, a nightmare for all time, forever they are forced to repeat this lovely rhyme.'_" I sang softly. "And one more version is, _'They were never woken from their terrifying dream; forever they would wander this twisted fairytale.'_" I paused to breathe, "It's…Not a happy story I guess…" I murmured with a sigh. Why did I choose that song again?

"Just like that one song you were singing in the hallway." The twin with his hair parted to the right said. I started to nod and then froze. I wasn't used to the idea of them having heard me I suppose. I decided to continue stretching.

"Why are you still on the floor?" Haruhi asked while cocking his head to the side. I paused. Right there…He…He…

_Sorta looked like a, 'She'…_

I never thought that!

_Yeah. But you know it's the truth. Haruhi is either gay, or actually a girl._

B-But…Maybe Haruhi is just an extremely feminine boy?

_Doubt it._

Gah…

"I'm, uh, stretching myself out. If I don't do this after I dance every single time I'll get cramps." I said softly as I slid into the splits. I pressed my torso against the leg in front of me, held my head down, and closed my eyes. I was starting to feel it already. I hadn't danced in a long time…

"Spence…" I heard Kimmie say quietly. I glanced up at her. "You're uniform is getting dirty..." She trailed off. I sat up, looked down, and saw that it was, indeed, dirty. The white fringes now held a grayish tint. If Takenaga hadn't paid so much for it I would have said, 'I don't care' but, it had cost so much…

I felt my upper lip twitch.

Slowly, I stood.

As if from some distance I heard Kimmie say, "The calm before the storm…"

"I have to wash this before I go home!" I cried as I started to wave my arms around frantically. "He paid so much for this dress and…A-And I just carelessly danced in it! I got it all dirty…And I…They'll be so very disappointed in me…I can't…they…" I started hyperventilating.

Suddenly Kimmie grabbed my shoulders, **"Yo. Spence. Chill out. Seriously. You can change into the clothes that I bring for when schools over. It's okay. Really. You can just come over to my house and I'll wash your uniform." **Kimmie told me in English. That was another thing I admired about her; she could speak English flawlessly and did so often. Sometimes just randomly switching over to it.

I gave her a grateful smile, **"Thank you Kimmie." **I switched to English as I thanked her. She smiled at me in response.

"What are you guys saying, Toy?" The twin with his hair parted on the right asked me.

Oh. So they can't speak English? But...

"You can't speak English?" Kimmie voiced my thoughts. Most of the Host Club shook their heads. The only people who didn't were Kyoya and Mori. Strange. Kimmie started to grin. "But it's required to learn English here. Are all of you failing?" She asked.

"I'm not...But I just started to learn the language so...All I heard were bits and pieces when you were speaking." Haruhi admitted.

"I'm not failing either!" Tamaki declared loudly. "I just have a bit of trouble with all of the rules..." He trailed off while frowning.

I nodded, "There are a lot of spelling and grammar rules in English..." I agreed.

_Yeah, but isn't this some prestigious school where everyone should know English? _

Not exactly...

_That Tamaki is dense...How'd he get into this school? _

That's not nice!

_I'm never nice, though... _

"-Toy can speak two other languages fluently. Can't you Toy?" The twin with his hair parted to the right asked me, dragging me away from my mental babble. He seemed to be doing a lot of the talking...The only problem was...I didn't know if he was Hikaru or Koaru...

"Yes...Spanish and French..." I trailed off. Then I heard something that sounded similiar to hiccup/gasp and I turned towards Tamaki...Who looked like he was about to cry. Wha...?

"You speak French...?" He asked with his eyes glistening. I stared at him in confusion.

"Y-Yes...Is there something wrong with th-" I was cut off as Tamaki scooped me up again and started to suffocate me with a hug.

"Oh, my sweet sweet daughter! You can speak the language of Daddy's nativeland!" He squealed as he continued to hug me. Wha...? I started to feel lightheaded.

"I...Can't...Breathe..." I gasped out.

"Oh je suis tellement désolé ma fille!" (_Oh, I'm so sorry my daughter_!) Tamaki responded to me in French. I stared up at him (Because he was quite a few inches taller than I) with wide eyes. He could speak French? I loved practicing my French! I haven't been able to since I came to Japan for obvious reasons.

"Ce n'est pas grave. Je suis si heureux! Maintenant, j'ai quelqu'un pour pratiquer mon français avec!" _(It's okay. I'm so glad! Now I have someone to practice my French with!) _I exclaimed in joy. Tamaki smiled.

"Ah, oui! Maintenant vous pouvez apprendre comment Haruhi être une vraie dame!" (_Ah, yes! Now you can teach Haruhi how to be a real lady!) _He grinned at me and clapped his hands together. I started to smile, but stopped. Something about what he just said...Didn't make sense. Why would I have to teach Haruhi how to be a lady...? If...He...Was...A...Boy...? Huh...?

_Hah. Knew that Haruhi was too fruity to be a, 'he.' _

What are you talking about?

_You're really slow. Haruhi's a girl, stupid. _

I froze immediately. Maybe Tamaki made a mistake... "Je suis désolé. Mais, pourquoi aurais-je besoin pour enseigner Haruhi comment être une femme ...?" (_I'm sorry. But, why would I need to teach Haruhi how to be a lady...?) _I asked Tamaki in confusion, my eyebrows knitted together.

He smiled, "Parce que je veux que mes deux de mes filles à devenir les meilleurs amis! Ensuite, Haruhi et vous pourriez porter des robes ensemble et vous pouvez convaincre de cesser de porter des vêtements de garçon ..." (_Because I want both of my daughters to become best friends! Then Haruhi and you could wear dresses together and you can convince her to stop wearing boy clothes...) _Tamaki smiled like he was day dreaming.

WHAT? HARUHI IS ACTUALLY A GIRL!

_Didn't we already establish that...? _

BUT HE-I MEAN SHE-I MEAN...IT! WHA...? WHAT IS GOING ON IN THIS HOST CLUB?

I probably looked shocked and somewhat dazed because Kimmie gave me a strange look and said, "You look like you just found out that your favorite singer was a fake." She narrowed her eyes, "What are you and Tama-idiot talking about?" She asked suspiciously. I was in such a state of shock that I didn't even scold her for calling Tamaki an idiot.

_Well he is one. You have to admit it. He probably just gave away the club's biggest secret. I wonder if the scary dude with glasses'll kill 'em...? That would be interesting to watch... _

HOW CAN YOU JOKE AT A TIME LIKE THIS? WHAT DO I DO! WHAT DO I DO?

_1) I don't really care and 2) if you haven't noticed, I'm the comic relief in this FanFiction. _

WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? HAS EVERYONE GONE CRAZY?

"Wait a...OH NO!" My head snapped up as Tamaki started to freak out, which in turn made me start to freak out, "SPENCER, DAUGHTER, I WAS KIDDING, JUST KIDDING! DO YOU UNDERSTAND? NOTHING I SAID WAS TRUE! YOU'RE MY ONE AND ONLY DAUGHTER!" He shouted at the top of his lungs as he gripped my shoulders.

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT YOU PERVERT? DON'T TOUCH SPENCER!" Kimmie shouted as she yanked me away from Tamaki. She glared at him. "I thought you were better than to say perverted things in another language to a defenseless girl! What did you say to her? She's obviously in shock!" Kimmie yelled, while clenching her fists.

I started to shake my head, "He wasn't saying anything perverted Kimmie! He wasn't! Don't hurt him!" I pleaded as I stepped in between her and Tamaki. She stared at me a moment, then popped her hip and crossed her arms.

"Than what did he say Spence?" She asked quietly. I started to sweat.

OH NO! WHAT DO I SAY?

"Uh...He...Well he said that...I mean...That is..." I spluttered. I was having an internal battle; should I tell the truth or a lie? AH! WHAT DO I DO?

"Hah." Kimmie snorted, "I knew you were trying to cover for him! Now move so that I can pummel him to a pulp!" Kimmie shouted. My eyes widened as she started to advance.

"No Kimmie! Really it's not what you think!" I shouted as I blocked her way.

"Oh really? Then what is it?" She growled. I started to freak out.

I couldn't just let Tamaki get beat up by Kimmie...

"If you don't have a reason then just mo-" Kimmie never got to finish her sentence.

"HE TOLD ME HARUHi WAS HIS DAUGHTER AND THAT I SHOULD TEACH HER HOW TO BE A REAL LADY, AN THAT WE SHOULD WEAR DRESSES TOGETHER!" I blurted out. Silence consumed the room.

"..."

"Sure as hell didn't see _that _one comin'." Kimmie said after a few beats of deafening silence.

_Man, today is a really nice day! One thing after another in your life just keeps going wrong! It's like a snowball effect. Maybe...Maybe the Host Club really will have to kill you! Sweeet..._

Why me? Why is it always me...?

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**A/n: So I updated pretty fast huh? And I used French! Oh yeah, and The song I used was Alice Human Sacrifice, which was originally Japanese, but I used lyrics that someone translated, which was why it wasn't bolded, because it's not officially translated in English. You should look it up, just go to Youtube and type in Alice Human Sacrifice rockleetist. She's amazing. But when I got to the fourth Alice (The twins) I used someone elses translations, not because rockleetist's are bad, but because I thought the one's that I used worked better for this story. So check that out. Now for shout outs: **

**Patcheresu: **Thank you for telling me about the italics. I almost went crazy trying to fix it! And I'm glad that you liked Chapter Two!

**Supergirl501: **Thank you! YES I AM BACK! I was out of commission for a while, cause...Well...I got really busy with school! But I had a three day weekend, so...I hope that this chapter answered all of your questions, and I'm glad that you like my humor!

**Melody Syper Carston: **Thank you! I'm glad that you're enjoying this story! =]

**Until next time! REVIEW PEOPLES! Luv ya! **

**~ XOXO EmiShae **


	4. Host Club Free?

******A/n-At-Beginning-Because-I-Am-Super-Apologetic: Alright, so how are all of you doing? Yes, yes...I've been gone much too long. I suck. I suck. I suck. I suck. I suck. I suck. I suck. A lot. And I'm very sorry. About many things. Like how all of my chapters are cliff hangers and my lack of consistent updates. I've had writer's block for quite sometime, but the creative juices are finally flowing again. So, for any of you I might have left, please review and let me know what you think. Without further ado...Here you go!**

******~ XOXO EmiShae**

* * *

_Review of last chapter:_

_"HE TOLD ME HARUHI WAS HIS DAUGHTER AND THAT I SHOULD TEACH HER HOW TO BE A REAL LADY, AND THAT WE SHOULD WEAR DRESSES TOGETHER!" I blurted out. Silence consumed the room._

_"..."_

_"Sure as hell didn't see that one comin'." Kimmie said after a few beats of deafening silence._

Man, today is a really nice day! One thing after another in your life just keeps going wrong! It's like a snowball effect. Maybe...Maybe the Host Club really will have to kill you! Sweeet...

_Why me? Why is it always me...?_

**Chapter Four:**

**Host Club Free...?**

"This is it Spence! The little bed and breakfast I told you so much about!' Kimmie said as she gestured towards the cute, yet modest, double story inn. It was beautiful. And peaceful. And best of all...Host Club free. I shivered at the thought. Just the name of their club dislodged memories from the day before.

* * *

_*FLSHBACK START*_

"_...So, that's the situation" Haruhi said. He...I mean SHE, had just finished explaining why she was posing as a boy and working as a Host. _

_I was in a state of shock. _

"_Just to be completely clear; in short, you broke a vase, they thought you were a boy and made you their dog. Then, when they found out you could charm ladies...They made you a Host." Kimmie asked with a quirked eyebrow._

"_Yes, that's pretty much it." Haruhi agreed. Kimmie's shoulders started to shake. Within a minute she was laughing aloud, clapping her hands together and stomping the ground with her foot._

_The entire Host Club stared._

"_Kimmie..." I trailed off in a disapproving tone._

_She waved her arms at me, "I know, I know! I'm being rude by laughing, but...COME ON! I've never met anyone so unlucky!" She exclaimed as she calmed her laughter. "No..." She shook her head and stopped laughing completely, "No, I'm sorry Fujioka." She clapped Haruhi on the shoulder, "I respect you a lot more now. I mean, you're still so normal, considering you were unfortunate enough to get roped into a club with these...Less than brilliant people." Kimmie apologized to Haruhi. _

_Ah...She just insulted the Host Club. I felt my eyebrows furrow._

_Tamaki looked utterly offended. He opened his mouth to say something, but I cut him off. I felt like I should diffuse the situation, and...I also think Kimmie was misunderstanding something._

"_Kimmie!" I said in a scolding tone. Everyone looked towards me, "That's not true. Haruhi was obviously brought here for a reason...You shouldn't belittle something without knowing the whole story."_

"_Spence...Gimme a break. This strange club. I know it scares-" Kimmie started to say, but I cut her off. (I seemed to be doing that often...I felt a bit bad about it.) _

"_That doesn't matter at all Kimmie. Whether they scare me or not. To go to such lengths as to hide Haruhi's gender...This club must be very important to them. Something very...Precious that they don't want to lose." I explained gently. I closed my eyes for a moment as a thought washed over me and smiled, "Dad always told me that even if someones actions may be cruel, or even confusing, to me at that moment, there's always a reason for it. He said, 'Spencer, all of the people in this world, though they may be different in many ways, are similar in one; they're all fighting to protect something. And even if it seems insignificant to you, it could very well be the entire world to them.'" I quoted my father in a reminiscent voice. _

_No one said anything for a few moments. When I opened my eyes everyone was staring at me this time. I started to sweat._

"_B-But...I'm sorry. I went off on a tangent, didn't I?" I asked as I rubbed the back of my neck with my right hand sheepishly. "I think, my point, is to say...Kimmie, look a bit closer at your surroundings?" My 'point' ended up becoming a question. _

_Kimmie was silent for a moment before she sighed and walked over to me, "This coming from the girl who gets lost in her own home because she doesn't pay attention to where she's going." Kimmie shook her head slightly. I opened my mouth to protest, but she continued before I could say anything, "However, if I couldn't see something that you could, then that means I must be blind, huh?" She chuckled as she flicked me on the forehead._

"_Wha-? Why...!" I asked as I held my forehead in confusion._

"_SPENCER! My lovely, darling other daughter! You're so heartfelt, so innocent! So pure!" I heard Tamaki cry as he launched himself towards me with tears in his eyes. My own eyes widened, as I stood there, rooted to the ground, feeling like a deer caught in the headlights._

_Oh...What...He's...SCARY! What do I do?_

Move away brilliant one.

_But that might hurt his feelings!_

And...?

_I didn't have to worry about hurting his feelings after all...Because at that moment Kimmie shoved him away._

"_No one gave you permission to touch her." Kimmie deadpanned.__ Tamaki instantly went to a corner and started emitting a dark aura._

"_Yes, well, now that you two know our club's biggest secret, I'll have to ask for your discretion concerning Haruhi's gender." Kyoya's voice cut through my worry for Tamaki. It was the first time he spoke since Tamaki spilled the beans._

"_Of course!" I exclaimed as I turned towards Haruhi, "Don't worry at all; we wont tell anyone! Our lips are sealed!" I assured Haruhi as I took her hands in mine and smiled at her brightly. She looked at me for a moment before eliciting a small warm smile._

"_I believe you."_

"_Never-the-less...We can't have you traveling too far away during summer break, just in case we need to check up on you to make sure you aren't talking about Haruhi's situation. So, please don't leave the country." Kyoya said with a pleasant smile as his glasses glinted in the light. _

_I swallowed and suppressed a shiver. Scary. He definitely scares me._

_*FLASHBACK END*_

* * *

I shook my head at the thought of the twins clinging to me afterwords and pleading with me to let them take me home. I also may have gone a bit overboard in my scolding Kimmie.

"Spencer!" I heard Kimmie shout. My head snapped up to see that she was already at the beautiful doors. "You spaced out again. Come on! I want to introduce you to someone." She called out to me as she slipped inside.

Oh! That's right. It was summer vacation. No time to be thinking about the scary Host Club. I ran to catch up with Kimmie, carrying the one bag I had managed to grab from the limo (still wasn't used to that) before Kimmie ushered me out of it. I felt bad about leaving my bags to her servants.

_Isn't that what they're here for, though?_

It doesn't feel right to me. It...Rubs me the wrong way, I guess.

I ran through the doors and almost ran into Kimmie and a lady she was talking to.

"Oh Kimmie! I'm so glad you could make it!" The woman said in a high falsetto-type voice. The lady had long light brown hair, with a golden tinit, was wearing a maid-like dress and was tall with...Broad shoulders?

...Eh?

Kimmie spotted me over the broad-shouldered lady's head.

"Spencer, this is who I wanted to introduce you to." She smiled, "Spence, this is my Uncle, Misuzu-chi. Uncle, this is my best friend Spencer Hastings." Kimmie said as Misuzu-chi turned around.

I stood there rooted to the ground in shock. The lady, er, man?-that I was looking at...Had mascara, purple eyeshadow and lipstick on.

Eh...? EH? MISUZU-CHI is a...He...She...? WHAT?!

_Heh. Looks like gender-bending is actually a common thing, huh?_

No...So...What?

_Grow up. He's a tranny._

Tranny as in...MISUZU-CHI IS A TRANSVESTITE?!

_...You're real thick, you know that, right? _

Am not! I just...I just don't...I'm just shocked! Lighten up a bit!

"Oh! Spencer Hastings! I've heard so much about you!" He-she?- hugged me tightly. It surprised me, but I hugged Misuzu-chi back.

"You're even cuter than I imagined you would be! Oh, I can't wait to see your uniforms on both of you!" He (I'll just go with 'he') cried in excitement. Kimmie and I had agreed to help out during break since, for obvious reasons, whatever Kimmie had originally planned for us to do was canceled.

_Yeah, because glasses dude is terrifying._

I agree.

_I take that back. He's the coolest person ever, I'm sure._

You did that on purpose, huh?

_No, duh._

...So mean...

_It's in my nature._

"Why don't you two go upstairs and change now, huh?" Misuzu-Chi ushered us up the stairs and to the room Kimmie and I would be staying in before I could even process what was happening.

"Catch Spence!" Kimmie tossed my uniform to me unexpectedly. I caught it, then proceeded to change into it. After we were both done we stood in front of the mirror and stared. I furrowed my eyebrows. I was wearing a peach long sleeved dress that went to about four inches above my knees, and over that I wore a frilly, lace covered wrap around apron, with a matching do-rag. Kimmie was wearing the same thing, but the color of her uniform was a sky blue.

"I can't believe Uncle Misuzu...Made my uniform like..This." She said darkly.

"Oh, it's not so bad Kimmie; it's cute!" I tried to stay positive.

"...We look like Lolitas." She twitched.

"Kimmie..." I reached towards her, but she was already spinning around and was running down the stairs shouting.

"UNCLE MISUZU YOU MUST HAVE A FEW SCREWS LOOSE IF YOU THINK I AM WEARING THIS!" Kimmie roared as she raced to where we had been speaking to Misuzu-Chi. I followed her down the winding staircase tentatively. "WHERE ARE YOU?" She shouted as she dashed into another pat of the pension.

Well, I'm glad that the pension is opening today. That means there aren't any guests to hear all of the yelling.

"Pssst! Spencer over here!" My eyes widened at my name as I glanced around myself. I saw Misuzu-Chi waving at me half way hidden by a door to a different room. I walked over to him.

"Misuzu-Chi, Kimmie is-" He cut me off as he tugged me into the room and closed the door.

"Shh! Not so loud! Kimmie is angry right now! Oh that girl! But look at you! I knew you'd be adorable in that outfit!" Misuzu-Chi gushed. "We're going to have so much fun together! Kimmie, me, you, and a daughter of a close friend of mine and we also have such charming cute boys visiting!" He bubbled. Cute boys? I hadn't seen any boys so far. "The only thing that could make it better would be..." Misuzu-Chi suddenly deflated, as if all of his excitement disappeared. I frowned in worry. He noticed and laughed a bit, "Oh, but it's okay!" He turned away, but I caught ahold of his arm.

"Do you have something that is bothering you? Because I know we just met, but I'm a really good listener! Sometimes having someone to listen will lighten your burden!" I gushed as I felt my face turn red. I was much too bold nowadays.

Misuzu-Chi's eyes seemed to sparkle, "Oh you really are adorable, inside and out!" He hugged me tightly and then paused, "I was just going to say how I would have liked my daughter Mai to be here. She doesn't like coming to see me anymore because...Well I suppose she's just embarrassed by me." He chuckled nervously. "She's always telling me to leave her alone. I guess I'm just a bother to her always inviting her to work at my pension during the summer."

"I'm sure that's not true!" I blurted. Misuzu-Chi looked up, startled by my sudden outburst. I felt a blush creep up my neck. "When...When I was little, my Dad would always laugh really loud when he found something funny. Then I would laugh with him and then we'd be laughing together. One day one of my friends asked me if his laughter embarrassed me, because of how loud and booming it sounded. It really surprised me. I had never really thought about it. His laughter meant he was happy. Even if he was a bit loud sometimes, it never bothered me. I loved him for never being embarrassed by himself. He was okay with it and that made me okay with it." I smiled, "So, Misuzu-Chi, I'm sure that Mai-Chan isn't embarrassed about you at all. She's letting you be you. I'm sure that she has sensed that you're uncomfortable around her and always worrying. It seems to me as if she's being considerate." I took Misuzu-Chi's hands in mine, "If you communicate with her properly, anything can be solved. I can tell you love her very much and that is all you need to mend your relationship."

Misuzu-Chi was quiet for a moment, then he smiled softly, "Yes, I think you're right. I think I'll give Mai a call tonight. Thank you Spencer-Chan!" He beamed.

I was still blushing, "I didn't do anything to be thanked for..." A dark thought overcame me and I gasped, "I told you I would only listen, didn't I? And here I was talking away without letting you speak at all, sorry about that!" I bowed in apology.

"You really are cute, aren't you? No need for an apology at all!" He ruffled my hair. Then Misuzu-Chi jumped as if a sudden thought had struck him. "Oh my! I need to open the pension now! Spencer, could you finish setting up the the silverware on these tables?" I nodded enthusiastically. He smiled, "Oh, wonderful, I'll leave it to you then!" And with that the whirlwind that was Misuzu-Chi swept through the doorway of the room we had been speaking in. I looked at my surroundings. I was in a dining room.

_Did you seriously just notice that?_

I was speaking to Misuzu-Chi, so I was distracted.

_Situational __awareness Spencer...Although I suppose that's too much to ask for from a total Space Cadet like you._

S-Space Cadet? Even you are calling me that now? I'm very aware of my surroundings, thank you.

_Really?_

Yes...I'm the Queen of being alert!

"Are you always this insightful?"

I smiled, "Well, yes, U-SUC-" My eyes widened. I spun around on my heel, coming face-to-face with...Haruhi Fujioka. "H-Haruhi?!" I squeaked in surprise.

_Ah, the cross_ _dresser. _

You shush!

Haruhi smiled, "Good afternoon Spencer."

"But, you...How..Why?" I stammered.

"My dad is friends with Misuzu-Chi." Haruhi clarified.

"Oh! So this is like your summer job?"

"Yes."

I looked over Haruhi a little better. She was wearing a pink flowy dress, with a cream wrap around apron, that was frilly, and a matching bandana. A sudden worry filled me.

"Haruhi, is it OK?" I asked, keeping my voice low.

Haruhi's brow furrowed, "Is what okay?"

"Is it okay for you to...You know be dressed as a girl right now?" I chewed on my bottom lip.

Understanding lit Haruhi's expression and she chuckled, "Oh, you mean that! Yes, it's fine. I'm no where near where any of those rich young misses would vacation."

I blew out a sigh of relief, "Oh, good. Because they're scary." My shoulders tensed as a thought struck me, "I mean! They seem like nice people and I don't judge a book by it's cover, because dad always said to give people more than one chance! But..." I hesitated and then lowered my voice, "Tax Collecter Guy scares me." Haruhi gave me a blank look. I slapped my forehead, "I mean Kyoya Ootori! I didn't mean...Please don't tell him I called him that! Because that would be bad! He'd get angry at me, then Kimmie would get angry at him and then the situation would get even scarier and-" I cut myself off, "I'm babbling again. I do this when I become nervous. I'll just...Be quiet now." I felt my shoulders slump.

_Word vomit much?_

I'm working on it.

_Not very hard..._

You...SHUSH.

Haruhi giggled at me, "You're cute when you do that."

I felt myself redden, "Everyone keeps calling me cute today." I smiled, "Not that I have anything against it!" I assured her.

"I was just setting the tables up for the pension to open, I suppose Misuzu forgot that I was here. Would you like to help me?" Haruhi offered.

"Yes! I would! I always enjoy being helpful!" I exclaimed as Haruhi handed me half of the silverware and napkins she had been holding. I happily set out on my task. Haruhi and I worked on in companionable silence. I was on my second table when Haruhi caught my attention.

"Miss Spencer-"

"Oh, you can just call me Spencer!" My eyes widened, "Unless you think that's much too forward of me!" My eyes widened further, "Come to think of it, I've been calling you Haruhi all this time, without asking you what you like to be called by! I'm terribly sorry!" I bowed in apology.

_Still word vomiting~_

Shushie U-SUCK Channel!

Haruhi waved her hand, "Oh no need to apologize! I'd be delighted if we called each other by our first names." She smiled warmly. I felt relieved instantly. "Spencer-" She smiled widely, "I just wanted to reassure you about the Host Club." I swallowed as she continued, "They're not really all that bad. They may be impulsive, and idiotic, but they're good people." She smiled, "I'm sure you'll come to like them."

_Yep. And your new best friend will be Glasses Dude._

I ignored the U-SUCK channel and concentrated on Haruhi.

I fiddled with my uniform nervously, "It's not that I think they're bad people at all. They just scare me, really." I paused, "But, new people in general usually scare me." I laughed half-halfheartedly, "It's a habit of mine that I'm trying very hard to break." I admitted.

Haruhi thought this over for a moment and nodded, "Yes, I can see what you mean. That's admirable; working hard to overcome something. Instead of running away you face it head on." She smiled encouragingly. I blushed again.

"I wouldn't say that...I _am_ currently avoiding and running away from the Host Club." I smiled sheepishly as I scratched my head.

"Is that so?" Twin voices chorused in unison.

My body registered the voices before my brain did and froze instantly. Two arms snaked themselves around my waist.

"Hello-" The twin on my right started.

"-toy." The twin on my left finished.

_What was that you said earlier about the this place being Host Club free?_ _If this isn't convincing enough evidence of you being cursed for life, then I don't know what is._

I couldn't help but agree.

* * *

**REPLIES:**

**Raven T: **I've never given up. Just had a hard time trying to write due to personal issues. But, I'm Baaaacccck~ Thank you for your kindness!

**Broadway And Books: **You've read my poorly written Newsies fanfics and you're still reading my work? THANK YOU! ^^ I know I'm two years late...But, here you are!

**Fluffy Fish: **...I feel underlying threats in your nonchalant manner of speaking about dangerous weaponry. Should I be frightened by this? Yes! I'm also very interested at seeing how I'll do that! I obviously haven't quite figured that out yet! xD Thank you for your review!

**SuperGirl501: **When does Tama-Chan ever think before he speaks? Never that's when. Haha!

**AnimeVamp1997: **Yes you do seem very hyper. Or you did. ANYWAY! Thanks for the review!

**Shan-Shan XP: **I strive for difference! Hahaha! Yes! She is quite Tohru-like, ne? Thanks for the review!


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